花開忘憂

 周深

花開忘憂

作詞：唐恬@勇士音樂
作曲：錢雷@勇士音樂

出品方：周深工作室

巷子口 買了花
穿過沿街紅墻青瓦
夕陽慢慢親吻著我的白髮
推開舊木門回到家

把時光 都燉香
而你只是笑不說話
一件遺憾的事 就喝一碗湯
庭院深深 秋葉飄落

我們蒼老的時候 就回到小時候
采青梅用來釀酒你 不許偷著喝
穿樸素的衣裳 牽著那衣袖
撿了小貓 名為蒼狗
我們睡去的時候 像孩子無憂愁
反正也很難上鎖這 歲月如小偷
若記憶被偷走了 忘了我的愛
我會說 你好啊

這是給 你的花
花的名字叫忘憂草
它說時光洶湧 如水上煙波
別走遠了 一起回家

我們蒼老的時候 就回到小時候
采青梅用來釀酒你 不許偷著喝
穿樸素的衣裳 牽著那衣袖
撿了小貓 名為蒼狗

我們睡去的時候 像孩子無憂愁
在夢裏做個夢看見你我都老了
那永恒沒騙我 離散也沒有
這份愛只是活在 另外時空
如果 每一聲再見 會開啟
一個新的空間
每做一個夢 是時空 偶爾的重疊
你好嗎 離開的人啊
請幫我 相愛到劇終

忘憂草 開著花
你在月光下 不說話
一件遺憾的事 就喝一杯茶
庭院深深 秋葉飄落

A working script

ACT 1

WOLF
(Wandering by the lake located in the dark, wintery forest, with snow falling, singing to himself)

I hope the flowers will continually bloom and accompany our youth eternally;
Every blooming flower symbolizing purity in mind and heart.

I hope to plant a vast forestland and listen to the echoing of every falling leaf;

And witness the tranquility of melting snow.

I! How can I not believe the dancing sparkling stars in the night sky? 

This is to keep my promise with the flowers.

Look! The stars in the sky writing out my thoughts;
Describing how our lives are tied together, embracing life.

Perhaps somewhere in the clouds hides a fairy listening to my wishes.  

Let us close our eyes and give our prayers.

SNOW

(a soft, comforting voice, from the snow falling from the sky responds to the wolf)

I wish to use my string instrument and play out the music of life to
accompany our youth eternally;

Every musical note possessing profound feelings of care and devotion.
I wish to use all my heart to give a performance that would
give listeners the feel of haven and solace.

Wolf by the lake, are you listening to me?

Yes! I do believe the dancing sparkling stars in the night sky!
Spring will come soon and sadness shall melt away soon.

WOLF

A sky full of stars! A picturesque of a meteor shooting out of the night sky.

SNOW
Writing down my thoughts, with your shadow.

WOLF
Representing you and me, reflection of each other eternally.

SNOW
Let your fairy help you embrace life.

WOLF

The fairy hiding in the clouds is listening secretly to my heart.  It is time to close my eyes.

(Reflection to be updated)

Lyrics to "Carry You" by Novo Amor

Torn down, full of aching
Somehow our youth would take the blame
Worn out, the way we let it stay

Taught how to celebrate it
All out, I'd replicate your pain
Climb down, if only for a taste

Hallowed, but hesitated
Shallow, but full in all your veins
Shadowed by every other weight

Hollow, a doubt can make it
Borrowed a love that never came
Followed in every other shade

Let it lead your love away
I never strayed
Let it bury you away
In all your blame, in all your pain
I will carry you always

Let it lead your love away
I never strayed
Let it bury you away

Fade me away, I won't ever be the same
Fade me away, I won't ever be the same
Fade me away, I won't ever be the same

起點。原點。終點。

原點。
Hearing a sentimental chord whispering from afar...
Conjuring a sense of nostalgia in the mind...
Drifting away are those intangible memories that we no longer can hold on to...
Letting go, sometimes, is the only option...
Maintaining an everlasting purity in the mind, heart, and soul ...
Ending the 5th chapter on the Formosan island...
Opening the 6th chapter with the most original purpose of setting foot on this island...

A story - 起點。原點。終點。
Author - cchen

A Short Story: A World Beyond My Perceptions

Year 2036.  With the candlelight placed next to my journal, I write about a place. A place so far away. Far away.

Darkness. I cannot see anything but darkness with my bare eyes. My arms, my hands, cannot seem to clutch on to anything. I've seemed to have been free-falling endlessly into a vortex, a trap with no way out. A gravitational force seems to be pulling me to a different dimension, a different world. After what seems to feel as if ages have passed, an intangible force suddenly throws me into an unfamiliar atmosphere. Thump! I slide onto ice, hard land. Wait, it is just pure land painted completely white. I slowly stand, turn my head in all directions, and glance at my strange surrounding.  Panic suddenly strikes me. I shut my eyes tightly, near paralyzed at what I have just seen.  So surreal.   I slowly lift my eyelids, once again.  Complete pale, white.  The sky. No there is no sky. No trees.  No signs of life, except for my solitary self. The land is covered with the color white.  Completely blank.  I do not know if I am even walking on land.  Where am I? Am I in heaven?  A bright, piercing light from a distance shines from a distance. I held my arm up against my forehead to shun the bright light from stabbing my eyes. A voice seems to be calling me. "Come this way, I will lead you."

Should I believe it or run away?  I need to find a way back home.  This place though not confined is yet another gigantic replica of a trap that emanates claustrophobic vibes. No, it may not be so.  It is just my imagination.  Breathe. Breathe.  As I slowly advance towards the light, I begin to sense a force is pushing me forward.  When I try to back up with hesitance, I realize that the spatial surrounding behind me has solidified into clear ice.   Panic suddenly strikes me that I must quickly compose myself and hasten my pace to escape.  I run towards the light.  But no matter how hard I try, it seems like I just could not get any closer.  Running out of breath and gradually losing the energy to push myself any further, I slip and fall and fall unconscious for a fleeting moment.  I slowly find the energy to unpeel my eyelids and the courage to stand back up.  I lift myself up with the palms of my hand against the ground, but as I look up, I see a motherly figure stand before me lending her hand to me.  I reach up to grab onto her hand.  Who is she? As soon as I stand up, the figure that was only inches away from me suddenly disappears into a shadow.  "Wait!" I yelp. I try to grab onto the remnants of the shadow, but it is too late.  

When I finally reach the light, I find myself warping into a shangri-la.  What is this place?  It seems so far away. Very far away. A place beyond my imagination. Everything in front me is unbelievable. A sudden gust of wind blows against my fast as I find my balance on the vast grassland.  This is no ordinary grassland or is it a prairie?  As I breathe in the crisp, clean air, I sense nostalgia.  Where am I? I questioned myself.  Am I still in the present........past.........or...or.. the future?  I could not tell which dimension I am in at all.  This place just seems so strange yet so familiar.   

I keep wandering. For miles and miles.  Suddenly, the motherly figure reappears and walks towards me.  She wears wrinkles on her face and is dressed in a simple beige robe.  Her hair was tied into a braid with strands of white, smooth hair.
    "Who are you?" I asked.
    "I am your Guidance," she responds with a soothing voice.
    "What is this place?  Why am I here?" I say worriedly.
    "You are lost, my child.  Let me guide you," she reassures me.
     "But... but," I hesitate, " I do not even know you, stranger. Where are you from?"
     "Call me Guidance.  I am from this place. This place you have found.  I am assigned to guide you. Do you mind walking with me as I show you to your destination."   
     She then glances at me with her deep, profound eyes.  "Don't worry, you will be fine."  
As we walk, a musical sound begins to play in the surrounding grassland.  The sound seems to be produced by a wind instrument.
     "What is this sound....or music?"  I ask the old lady.
     "It is the folktale in this community.  Let me sing to you to calm your heart."
And she begins.

There is a place. A place that is very very far away.  
There is also wind there.  There is also a very old piece of grassland.
The proud mother's eyes are so deep and profound.
Her voice so tender and mild.
Ulan Bator's Night...is so quiet, so beautiful.
Warm songs resound gently, rustling winds  gently blow.
Ulan Bator's Night...is so quiet, so beautiful.
The singer should not shed tears.

There is a place.  A place that is very very far away.
That place has a deep yearn for people so dear to you.
People of this grassland are carefree.
They would like to drink and with glee.
Ulan Bator's Night...is so quiet, so beautiful.
You are so far from me, but seems so near.

Ulan Bator's Night...is so quiet, so beautiful.
Listeners of this song are not allowed to shed tears.

The sound level of the music gradually fades away.  I turn and then ask the old lady, "Guidance, what is this song about and why did you sing it to me?"

(TO BE CONTINUED...)

Who?

As the sun sets upon the streets, I often see an aged man.

He wanders and stop; talking to himself, he must be lost.

Some say he has been waiting for his lover; however, he has been lonely for so many years.

Some say he has been looking for his children for many years.

Who knows who he is?

Who knows who he is looking for?

Once again, with the winds blowing through the bitter cold, the sun sets upon people rushing along the streets.  

I see him again, but this time, he is wearing even more wrinkles like the wind withering away the youth of a tree.

He follows along with the crowd like a child stumbling, losing balance.

Then...gradually, he slows his foot steps and looks ahead of him, his expression filled with panic.

Who knows who he is?

Who knows of his whereabouts?

Suddenly, the wild wind howls.

In a blink of an eye, the streets are empty.

A dear friendship

The merciless rain, the ruthless wind

have swept away the dear friendship between us.

A lonely shadow appears in the drizzling rain before dawn. Your story has taken a rest mark. 

When I think about your wanderings in an unknown realm, I see you holding back endless tears of pain.

Your heart is full of yearnings.

Thinking about it hurts me deeply in the heart.

If you want to cry, please do so.

My clothes is your handkerchief.

If you are tired, if you cannot walk anymore, I will carry you on my back for life. Unfortunately, all is late.

I anguish over your unjust sufferings and my inability to help you bear your burdens.

I am wistful of walking by your side until forever.  Our dear friendship is deep and difficult to part.

If I could own every tomorrow,

I will make promises to you that I will not regret.

My love for you will live forever.

The World Outside

Long, long ago, you were mine, I was yours.

Long, long ago, you left me, spread your wings to fly on your own.

The world outside is filled with exciting challenges.

Yet the world outside is filled with matters beyond your grasp.

When you realize your ability to achieve the challenges, I will be standing here truthfully giving you my full support and encouragement.

Everyday when the sun sets on the west, I will be standing here expecting you.

When you realize the obstacles encountered are beyond your grasp, I am stilling here patiently waiting for you to overcome them.

Though the sky is drifting with rain, I will  still be standing here waiting patiently for your eventual return.

I will  still be standing here waiting patiently for your eventual return.

(A simple yet meaningful translation: 外面的世界）

The Snowing Cherry Blossoms

When spring is gone, what is left of the sadness behind me?

I often see my former self,

making decisions thoughtlessly.

And not knowing the reason why I continue to latch on to my stubbornness.

Redemption 

A sudden gush of wind blows against my face. As I turn around, I see pink cherry blossoms falling like snow against the breeze.

The wind continues to blow, blowing my foolishness, my unrestrained indulgences.

Amelioration.  

My broken memories continue to drift like the snow-like palest pink petals. They are filled with distant nostalgia that are no longer tangible and cannot be seen with the bare eyes. Who are the loved ones who are still lingering in my thoughts?

Acceptance.

I continue to walk along this path of cherry blossom trees.......

Home

今天突然很想回家. 最近每個週末都會出去散散心.  一向獨來獨往的我看著滿街都是人.  看見一家人開心得共進午餐.  看見一群朋友從戲院走出來歡樂的笑聲. 已經很久沒有和家人朋友好好得聚聚.  「家」這個字對我來說很遙遠，幾乎觸碰不到.  雖然在台灣收獲很多也學習到了許多累積了教學經驗，今天我任然覺得這個島還是那麼得陌生.  我的「家」只能用想像力來安慰自己. 家的新鮮空氣，熟悉環境， 還有我搞笑的哥哥，表姊妹弟們，還有我的寶貝狗狗. 繼續等待........回家的那天.  在一年兩年，不知道.....

Chapter 5: A New Picture - "Infinitism"

A new beginning. A new place to seek refuge in the mind and soul.  Wandering thoughts have long dissipated.  I have picked up my pencil once again.  Am moving on and putting my acquired knowledge into use.  My canvas is no longer white.  It is filled with different shades. I have begun this piece of artwork a year ago.  Though it has not reached completion, it has been titled "Infinitism."  

Art is everywhere. Everything we do is an art.  Teaching is an art.  An art that calls forth internal and external transformation in light of knowledge, creation, and wisdom.  Every word I instruct - verbal and written.  The effective dialogue created with the students. Understanding the efficacy and conduciveness of the material designed for students.  All elements elegantly weaved together form a work of art.  

I am still polishing this art. This picture I have chosen to paint is an unending process.  Frustration. Sleepless nights.  Endless contemplation, analyzation, synthesis, and self-evaluation. Incessant self-reflecting in my instruction, curriculum/material design, test design, and collaboration with colleagues.  All contribute to shaping students into effective, active, and independent learners.

Have I changed? Am I exhibiting more conviction in what I do? Have I ascended one level higher in terms of improving onself? I ask myself these questions  everyday. I try not to let my doubts inhibit my ultimate goal in helping the students become successful learners.  

Teaching ELLs continues to be a challenging task for all of us, but the greatness about specializing in this art is having the opportunity to witness the students acquire the English language, each taught with instructions tailored to their needs and personality.  

           Seeing shy learners blossom into active participants, asking endless questions.  

           Seeing learners string meaningful words together into sentences, paragraphs, and essays.

           Seeing learners attempting to read and comprehend a novel.

This new picture ........I believe is a turning point - a life-changing moment allowing me to answer my inner queries about my purpose here on Earth.

Under the Stars

Once again.

Time continues to fleetingly dissipate into thin air. My surroundings have silently changed. This stabbing memory has aged in a blink of an eye. A precious bond, kinship, hastily scattered in one night. Gone. 

I stand under the lonely night sky.
I dare not to look up at the glimmering stars filled with precious recollections.
Everything shattered momentarily, once again. Let time continue to veil this scar.

I stand under the lonely night sky,
Reminiscing all the lost promises once made.  Unable to discern the countless brilliant stars piercing the night sky　
The pain resurfacing and haunting me, once again.

Suppress. In the night. Under the stars.

 

故事

妳是故事里的哪一个角色?
還是聽故事的人?
還是說故事的人?
還是站在遠處看妳身旁的故事慢慢演出在妳眼前?

我想我們都是.

我們人一出生就是一個新的故事.  要好好的把自己的故事寫得完整美麗談何容易？ 我們每個人都會經過人生好多階段. 每一個階段就好像書裡面的一段章.  每一章里都會有悲歡離合，依依不捨、痴情、逃避, 害怕、爾虞我詐，虛偽，貪念，犯錯、傷害、誤會，遺憾，思念，痛苦、反省、原諒、寬容、雨過天晴、從新來過、等等。。。每天過著好像演不完的戲.

一頁一頁的寫.  何時了?

到了最後...所有故事漸漸離我們遠去，慢慢的從記憶裡消失, 一切化為烏有...化為「空」。


雖然如此, 這故事還是要寫完.........不能沒有完結篇.

其實...我只是想要寫出一個真實的明天. 真實的故事.
這故事里將有個蔚藍的天空收容一切的希望,
也將結束流浪 結束迷失的臉龐,  遠離優傷,
讓無辜的孩子都可以有夢想和歡樂
也希望可以蓋一座小小的天堂讓他們養夢自在飛翔.

請再給我一點力量把這故事簡簡單單的寫完.

Chapter 4: Too Late

No more words left......
Heart emptied of feelings.....
Have I forgotten everything?
Everything seems to be washing away quickly.
Pain no longer piercing my soul.
Is this friendship too late to mend?
Maybe...
I will no longer hold on to it.
I learned. The more I want to grasp onto a priceless treasure, the more it will slip away like sand grain escaping from between my fingers.
No more tears.
No more apologies.
No more nonsense.
I will only continue to miss you and your words to me.

When dawn breaks, I will start anew.

A Reflection: The Dream I Dreamed

I will be starting a new life in Taiwan soon. I will be continuing my career as a teacher at a bilingual school. Having said this, I am still in disbelief as I have not made such a big decision in my life before. The thought of living a Pacific Ocean away from a community I am familiar with has been making me anxious lately. I am beginning to feel what my ESL students had felt when they immigrated to the United States. Living on my own in another country seems somewhat daunting but I will find my way.

I have always dreamed of teaching abroad when I first applied to the Charter College of Education. It was the dream I dreamed and still am dreaming. I thought it would be good to begin building my teaching skills from the younger grade levels. What I did not know is obtaining a permanent credential would require so many years.  Well, in my case, it did and still is! To look on the positive side, I really have accomplished a great deal. Right?!

There have been moments of wanting to give up this dream during both the credentialing process and the TESOL program. I lost faith in myself. I truly did. This is what happens when you set super high expectations for every situation and for everyone. I had to learn the hard way, but I still finished both programs. I would not have gone this far and built such confidence without the initial guidance of my credentialing supervisor and master teacher, and eventually a big boost by my TESOL professors, especially Dr. KS. This dream could not have been made possible without them. I have made mistakes along the way, but my teachers have always been a huge support. This invaluable support they have given me will live strong inside of me. The other main support comes from the friends I grew up with and my CSULA friends, especially the group brought together by Dr. P. Cannot thank them enough for their friendship. I will miss my teachers and friends.

Now I will turn the tide of this journey as a teacher to Asia and take a somewhat different path.

Words by Carol

"I want to be able to wake up with a smile on my face and say I love what I do."

Chapter 3: The Moment

An artist's mind is always wandering. Waiting for the right moment, I sit quietly drawing a person contemplating.

Where does one seek inspiration? Surroundings? People in one's life? My canvas had remained clean until I heard the song "River Flows in You." This song continues to flow in me. I repeated the song as I drew this person. This person is contemplating. Contemplating about worries? Why worry? Stop! This person's mind is filled with negative images that cannot be unveiled to others. The person tries to runaway from these images. This pain, this person just cannot control? So many things that cannot be said. Cannot help. Cannot say the reason for leaving. Until the person realized the pictures have already occurred, everything was too late. The person awaits punishment and readily accepts it. Has everything gone? Yes. This person believes it has. Wanted to explain. No courage. Will the person be accepted again? Afraid to know the answer is no. This Gift, should I embrace it or detest it? I will not answer. I will never go against natural causes anymore. Even so, I am not going to stop drawing.

It is late now. I am thinking time will heal the wounds caused. They were never meant to be created. I will await with a forgiving heart and will let this river continue to flow in me. I hear water streaming along with nature's force. Never ending. Never ending. I will let all the darkness fade away from my mind and be a light to the people around me.

1001 Nights

She always withdraws from communicating with others.

She waits from sunset until dawn.

In loneliness, autumn comes, spring goes.

Promises once made fly away into emptiness.

The person in her dream still hasn't returned.

1001 nights...

Not one night did she not think of him.

Every thought is overtaken by non-paired butterflies.

1001 nights...

Not one night did she not tear...

All the tears storming inside her heart have frozen.

That night the rain poured heavily.

The petals in the garden all fell.

Those golden chrysanthemum were planted for her.

Everyone tells her to let go.

But she will just smile back at you,

At the heart of her palm are all her memories.

1001 nights...

Every night I see her missing him.

Who is the one causing so much worry on her face?

1001 nights...

Every night I hear her tear.

I don't know how I could come to comfort her.

Let me start from tonight, stand by her, and softly sing

a warm melody for her.

After the flower blossoms......

I'm beginning another story. This is just the prelude.
Title: (To be determined)


What kind of key can lock a promise forever?

What kind of song can be sung forever?

After many many years later, when white hair becomes visible to the eye, will you still remember the promise that we'll forever know each other?

If I do want a forever, how many years can you give me?

After the flower blossoms, how long would it take for its petals to fall?

How far do the birds have to fly, so that we no longer can see them?

If young age lasts only one blink of eye, when do the loved ones have to leave each other?

We are all looking for a spring that will last forever.

We are all hoping for an everlasting promise.

But a beautiful dream can easily shatter.

Loved ones can easily languish

And eventually face each other with tears...

Chapter 2: This Night

This Night I sat down to draw again. Nothing came. I really wanted to do the drawing. I wanted to draw a landscape with butterflies. I promised a friend I would do this one for her.

No more ink. This pen, emptied of ink, suddenly reminded me of my desolate heart. I am sitting here in this very dark room. I have music on. I began to fight with my inner-self again. What is happening to my hand? Why can I not draw? I fell asleep. I seemed to have slept for a very long time.

simple

I wonder why it is so hard for me to think simple and write simple. I think my brain is filled with too much unnecessary junk that needs to be deleted with the computer keyboard delete button. UGH!